Speak Softly BUT Stand Firm
The words of advice found in today’s title rings true for growing business, accepting a new career position, and for dealing with potential partners. In conversation with others today, the subject matter proved important.
My friend “Janis” relayed what happened at a Community Town Hall meeting where she spoke. Someone in the audience suggested Janis was not working for the community good. After the meeting ended, Janis approached that person to kindly tell her how those words hurt her and unfairly portrayed what actually transpired. By the time Janis finished in her soft voice, the other person profusely apologized.
This led to the sharing of my story where once upon a time I was excited about meeting a gentleman for coffee. He was far more experienced in business. However in our then current endeavors we complemented one another nicely and I was looking forward to possibly creating a partnership with him.
My meeting with “Jim” did not turn out to my expectation. Jim began the conversation in a less than friendly tone. To my dismay, he deliberately noted I once sold a not so well known brand of business equipment. He then puffed his chest out and bragged to establish his prowess by announcing, “I went through Xerox training not once but twice.” His demeaning manner expressed how lucky I was to be sitting at the same table as he.
Mentally and within seconds I argued with myself whether or not to continue our conversation to explore possible ways to partner. I had been trained to always speak kindly no matter the circumstance. Coming to grips with what was just said, and in a mean tone, I took the exact opposite approach using a quiet and soft tone. Innocently, I smiled and said, “I made a very good living taking business away from Xerox Reps.”
As my sentence finished, I saw Jim’s jaw drop and all signs of puffiness melted away. At that point, I got up to say thank you for meeting me today. I then walked out the door.
The bottom line to these stories is, in any situation be prepared to have a one-to-one or heart-to-heart conversation on an equal playing field. Once someone tries to take the upper hand, stand up to be heard. But instead of mirroring their aggressive behavior, speak your mind in a gentle way. This makes a greater impression and you then may decide whether to remain or leave.
Integrity is of utmost importance in all you do, and this includes being true to yourself. You will command respect thereby attracting the right people, job and opportunities in alignment with what you believe. From thereon out, it will be a Smooth Sale!
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